JPCC Counseling Ministry

You have just received a message or a phone call with a shaky voice on the other end of the line – and suddenly someone you care for is suddenly thrown into one of the most difficult seasons of their lives: a season of grieving. With or without warning, this will be a challenging time. Note that while this article is geared towards comforting individuals who have lost a loved one, this is also applicable to other situations, e.g. the loss of a relationship, or a divorce. For those who are grieving, the people around them can influence how well they come out of this season. As their inner circle, how we engage with them, what we say, whether we are sensitive to their feelings, can have a major impact on the duration and intensity of the grieving process. Critically, good intention often is not enough. Sometimes in wanting to help them, we can end up making matters worse and complicating their grief. Therefore, it is important that we understand what is helpful and what is not. The purpose of this article is to help you help your grieving loved one. We understand it can be incredibly frustrating to see them suffering. We want to help you better understand what they are going through and how to best support them.

Anda baru saja menerima suatu pesan singkat atau mendengar suara yang gemetar dalam suatu panggilan telepon – tiba-tiba, seseorang yang Anda kasihi terlempar ke dalam salah satu musim tersulit dalam hidup mereka, musim berduka. Dengan atau tanpa peringatan, musim ini adalah waktu yang penuh tantangan. Sebagai catatan, walaupun artikel ini ditujukan untuk menghibur pribadi-pribadi yang ditinggalkan oleh orang yang mereka kasihi, artikel ini juga dapat diaplikasikan untuk situasi lainnya, seperti kehilangan suatu hubungan atau sebuah perceraian. Untuk mereka yang sedang berduka, orang-orang di sekitar mereka dapat mempengaruhi bagaimana mereka keluar dari musim tersebut. Sebagai orang-orang terdekat, bagaimana kita berinteraksi dengan mereka, apa yang kita katakan, kesensitifan kita terhadap perasaan mereka, dapat memberikan pengaruh yang besar kepada durasi dan intensitas dari proses berduka mereka. Sayangnya, maksud baik seringkali tidak cukup. Tidak jarang ketika ingin membantu mereka, kita malah memperburuk situasi dan memperumit rasa duka mereka. Oleh sebab itu, sangatlah penting untuk kita mengerti apa yang dapat membantu dan apa yang tidak. Tujuan dari artikel ini adalah untuk membantu Anda dalam membantu orang yang Anda kasihi yang sedang berduka. Kami mengerti, saat kita melihat mereka menderita bisa membuat kita sangat frustrasi. Kami ingin membantu Anda memahami lebih baik apa yang sedang mereka lalui dan bagaimana cara terbaik untuk mendukung mereka.

When we have to say goodbye to someone we love, the feelings can be so complicated that no words on a page can do it justice – especially if the goodbye comes suddenly and without warning. For some, their chest aches so bad that it feels like it will split open. For others, the tears will come and may not stop for weeks, months or even occasionally through the years. Losing someone we love is undoubtedly one of the hardest and most difficult processes we will ever go through, and the memories often linger much longer than the person themselves. W  hile we can’t take the pain away, we love you dearly and want to help in the best way we can. We understand that it is impossible to capture the vastness of what you are going through in an article, but here is a list of ways that may aid you through this difficult season which we hope will help you cope with life and loss. As you read through this, know that our hearts break knowing that you are going through this season, we are praying for and with you.